The Necessity of Mind-Body Connection

You are not a floating head

When people enter counseling for the first time, there are often unspoken expectations about how the process will unfold. We’re going to talk about our feelings that confuse us, memories that you want to forget but can’t quite get past, or maybe even address some maladaptive patterns of thinking.

But what about building an understanding or connection to your own body? Has this ever been one of your motivations or goals for seeking out counseling in the first place?

In the Western world, we have taken up an ancient notion that our minds are separate from the rest of us. Our minds have, in many instances, become the center of our being. We become floating heads walking around with a bunch of dead weight below our shoulders. The only issue is that you are not a floating head. None of us is.

Dr. Dan Siegel, in his book titled The Developing Mind, puts forth this definition of the mind: “The system of the mind, the flow of energy and information, is not limited by skull or skin. This system of mind happens within the whole body and in our relationships – it is within and between, embodied and relational. The mind is an embodied and relational process that regulates the flow of energy and information.”

The Mind in Process

What Dr. Siegel is getting at here is that while we may be operating under the assumption that our mind is stuck in between our ears, the reality is that our mind is a process. It is something that is formed in and through relationships, and it regulates the flow of information. This information comes from external stimuli, our own consciousness, our subjective experience, and our internal process of self-organization. These four facets of the mind contribute to the embodied and relational process of the mind.

Additionally, there are two key words that I would like to draw from Dr. Siegel’s definition of the mind: embodied and relational.

To touch on the relational aspect of the mind, Dr. Siegel provides another helpful principle for how we can understand the mind. He says:

“The mind, as an emergent property of the body and relationships, is created within internal neurophysiological processes and external relational experiences. In other words, the mind is a process that emerges from the distributed nervous system extending throughout the entire body, and also from the connecting communication patterns that occur within relationships.”

Putting it more simply, our human connections and relationships shape neural connections in our brains, and each of these types of connections contributes to the shaping and forming of the mind. Your relationships shape your mind.

To revisit the quote above, Dr. Siegel mentions the nervous system as being a part of the mind. Here, we begin to step into the embodied part of this definition.

The Embodied Nervous System

Your nervous system extends throughout your entire body from your brain to your torso, to your arms, and to your legs. It’s a highly complex and connected system that receives external stimuli from the environment, and then transmits signals throughout the body to motivate you to adapt to the environmental changes. These adaptations to changes in our surroundings are always geared toward bringing us safety.

Jennifer Mann and Karden Rabin, in their book titled The Secret Language of the Body, draw our attention to the need for an understanding of our nervous system to “speak the secret language of the body.”

During their years of research and working with clients, they have come to understand that our nervous systems are the language that our bodies use to communicate with us, not our brains. This means that healing from past pain, or even enduring stressful/unpleasant situations, is far more about tending to our bodies than just tending to our thoughts.

We can think about this from a Biblical perspective as well. In Paul’s first letter to the Corinthian church, he states, “Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.” 1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (ESV)

The implications of this verse are important for us to consider in this conversation. If our bodies are likened to being a temple in which the Spirit of God Himself dwells, we ought to be good stewards of such a vessel. By tending to our bodies, we tend to the temple of the Holy Spirit.

Tending to Our Bodies

Breathing For about one minute, intentionally bring your awareness to your breathing.

• Notice your breathing pattern.
• Is your breathing labored? Are your breaths shallow? Is your breathing steady?
• Simply notice without judgment. You are not trying to “fix” your breathing, but to just notice it.

Action After noticing your breathing, take another minute to notice what actions your body wants to do right now. Does your body want to run? Does your body want to fight? Does your body want to be held?

Sensation After noticing what actions your body wants to do, take another minute and bring your awareness to what sensations are in your body.

• Are your shoulders tight? Is your jaw clenched? Is there tightness or openness in your chest?
• Notice how the sensations in your body are connected to actions your body wants to do.

Emotions After noticing the sensations in your body, take another minute and bring your awareness to the emotions you’re experiencing right now.

• Are you experiencing sadness? Anger? Joy? Peace?
• Notice how the emotions you’re experiencing may be connected to the sensations in your body.

Mind Finally, after taking an inventory of your breathing, actions, sensations, and emotions, take a moment to notice if any of these are congruent with the thoughts running through your mind about what you’re experiencing.

• What do you notice about the thoughts you’re having about what you’re experiencing?
• Are your thoughts calmer now that you’ve listened to what your body is telling you?

By implementing strategies like the BASE-M model of awareness, the goal is to practice slowing down and to tune in to what our physical bodies are communicating to us. By turning our awareness and attention to what’s happening on our insides, we practice being embodied.

In my experience as a counselor, I have come to notice that many people are hesitant to engage in the practice of being embodied due to unresolved emotional distress. When anger, sadness, loneliness, etc. begin to feel too big for someone to process by themselves, it becomes much easier to create emotional distance internally.

When a person creates emotional distance in themselves, often the goal is to protect themselves or others from the depth of the emotional experience.

We often interpret this sense of distance as safety. However, we are actually cutting ourselves off from fully processing and resolving the big emotions our bodies need to resolve. Otherwise, these unresolved emotions will linger in us and prevent us from living a fully connected life. Fully connected with God, fully connected with others, fully connected with ourselves.

Again, you are not a floating head

God has designed our bodies to be a beautifully complex and integrated creation in which we house His spirit, give Him glory, and experience the world. Tending to your body’s needs is equally important as tending to your mind. In fact, by tending to your body, you are also tending to your mind and vice versa. The two are not as separate as we have often believed.